Easter is approaching and if you haven’t yet got your tickets for the annual Easter Egg Roll on the White House lawn, sorry, you’re too late. The tickets were free and were available through an online lottery which, alas, closed in early March. All you had to do was to go to recreation.gov and create an account, choose a password, and hope you were one of the lucky ones.
By the way recreation.gov is the official government agency and reservation system for all your trip planning needs. If you are planning a vacation to a national park or other cultural venues across the country, it is your go-to source for reservations, ticket permits, etc. As far as I know, the President’s Department of Government Efficiency (DOGE) has not yet… well let’s not go there.
Speaking of the White House Easter Egg Roll (which is officially, in typical government jargon, referred to as WHEER) you may have heard that the White House is, for the first time, soliciting sponsors for the event. The WHEER has been around since President (POTUS) Rutherford B. Hayes let a bunch of kids enter the White House grounds after President Ulysses S. Grant had previously signed a bill banning the “rolling of eggs” on Capitol grounds. It has been an annual tradition ever since.
It is the intention of the current administration to make this Egg Roll the “greatest ever.” It is soliciting corporate sponsors to help fund the event. Maybe, for just $75,000, Eggland’s Best Eggs can have their logo on the little plastic eggs (They haven’t used real eggs in years. Which is a good thing because real eggs are very expensive these days).
For $200,000, sponsors can have a booth set up around the South Lawn along with other companies. Hershey Corporation could hawk chocolate bunnies, beverages, and other snacks. Families could even win a tour of the White House and have brunch with the First Lady (FLOTUS) sponsored by Tripadvisor or Expedia. The solicitation guidebook suggests that sponsors could be “a part of history” and gain “valuable brand visibility and national recognition.”
As you may have guessed, I have a couple of ideas to enhance the Egg Roll and make it an even greater experience. First, they could expand the event to include an easter egg hunt. Any kid who finds an egg with the presidential seal printed on it gets a ride in the presidential limousine. Better yet, a corporate executive of a sponsor could, say for $1,000,000 donation, drive the “Beast” around the White House driveway, but only once. Disney could sponsor golf cart rides for the kiddies. Tesla could raffle off a used one of their cool stainless-steel trucks. So many ideas, so little time.
Imagine a giant electronic score board over the South Lawn with high-definition screens to catch every detail of the exciting roll to the finish line. It is a good bet Ceasars Palace would agree to cough up tons of money to get that sponsorship. Netflix could, for a tidy sum, stream the event live across the world.
Some people don’t agree with this sponsorship idea. One former White House big whig (who has requested anonymity for fear of retribution) suggested that the White House is not a sports arena “with logos plastered all over the place for a price.”
Come on man, lighten up. This could be the greatest egg roll ever.
Mattapoisett resident Dick Morgado is an artist and happily retired writer. His newspaper columns appeared for many years in daily newspapers around Boston.
Thoughts on…
By Dick Morgado
This is too funny. May you and your family have a Blessed Easter Holiday . Welcome back !!!!!!