If you have been paying very close attention, you will know that the holidays are quickly approaching. I saw my first Christmas shopping ad on television back on October 21. On the 23rd, that big city newspaper north of here ran a 36-point, bold-faced headline proclaiming “Just 62 Shopping Days Left“! And on the 24th, I noticed that our local sub sandwich shop had a jingle bell wreath hanging on the door. Please, it isn’t even Thanksgiving yet.
This premature, forced advancement of the holiday spirit has naturally spiked this scribe’s interest in holidays. There are 12 official federal holidays: New Year’s Day, Martin Luther King Day, Inauguration Day (every four years and it is too early to talk about that, too, so let us not), Washington’s Birthday (which is the same thing as President’s Day), Memorial Day, the Fourth of July, and Juneteenth, which recognizes the final enforcement of the Emancipation Proclamation. That covers six months of the year. There is Independence Day, Columbus Day (which may soon be known as Indigenous Peoples Day), Veterans Day, Thanksgiving and, of course, Christmas to close out the aforementioned gift buying season.
Individual states have their own holidays, as do many religions. Then there is Flag Day, Valentine’s Day, Halloween and Kwanzaa, which are not official holidays, and of course Festivus for the rest of us (google it.)
Bet you didn’t know there are 365 unofficial holidays, one for every day of the year. No doubt you have heard of National Popcorn Day, (January 19.) I think the movie-theater operators invented that one, National Baby Boomers Recognition Day (August 17 Hurrah!), and National Eat Beans Day, which ought to be an official holiday. Maybe they could place National Garlic Eating Day next, making for a nice long weekend where no one has to be at work.
I can go on and I think I will.
Foods have many celebratory days. One of my favorites is National Chocolate Covered Cherry Day, though Chocolate Covered Everything Day on December 16 comes in a close second. There are also National Spaghetti, Peanut Brittle, Carrot Cake days, followed soon after by Bacon and then Potato Lovers Days.
National Clam Chowder Day is surely popular around these parts. National Taco Day, Noodle Day, Cheese Day and Pasta Day are all in October. Oh, and I forgot, National Baloney Day, which was October 24. (That would be the food, not columnist’s day.) Don’t forget National Pickle Day. Surely someone will soon declare a National Pickle Ball Day.
I discovered that there is a National Rubber Ducky day, which will forever be close to my heart as I once worked at the Hagen Toy Factory on Barstow Street, stuffing whistles in ducks’ … never mind.
National Bubble Day is January 8, followed shortly by National Bubble Bath Day on the 30th. Shouldn’t they be reversed? You could take a nice bath on National Goof off Day. If you are upset with someone and need to tell them to go fly a kite (please not me), National Go Fly a Kite Day is February 8. I haven’t noticed any kite flyers in these parts in the snowy days of February, but you never know. You might have guessed that April 15, Tax Day, is also National Clown Day. And, if you see someone named Joe, wish him happy birthday as March 27 is National Joe Day.
If you have more energy than I, you may even find more than I have, but I’m finally celebrating National Lazy Day. It was on August 10, but it really is every day for me.
Editor’s note: Mattapoisett resident Dick Morgado is an artist and retired newspaper columnist whose musings are, after some years, back in The Wanderer under the subtitle “Thoughts on ….” Morgado’s opinions have also appeared for many years in daily newspapers around Boston.
Thoughts on…
By Dick Morgado