My bride and I have been watching a lot of British TV lately. I think I have become quite an Anglophile. We particularly like detective dramas. Unlike U.S. shows, there are no shoot’em ups, car chases, or much violence. The detectives solve the crimes using their skills and brains, very much like Sherlock Holmes.
I find some habits of the Royal family intriguing too. For example, I’ve learned that the late Queen Elizabeth occasionally enjoyed a cucumber sandwich with her afternoon tea. According to The Guardian, a British newspaper, historically the lives of the leisurely upper class were “sedentary, and dainty food sustained them.” Plus, “they were light and tasteful.” (The sandwiches, not the upper-class.)
If you’re like me, who prefers to do nothing most of the time, a nice, crustless, white-bread sandwich with a touch of cream cheese would hit the spot.
Just as I was about to try one, a newsflash appeared on my phone announcing that the FDA has recalled cream cheese. Are you kidding me? Upon further research, I found that the CDC has warned that there is an outbreak of salmonella … wait for it … in cucumbers!
Has anyone told the Brits?
Food warnings and product recalls seem to be happening frequently these days. I was planning on enjoying my sandwich with a nice cup of decaffeinated coffee. (I don’t drink tea. I’m not that much of a limey … yet.)
The Environmental Defense Fund has asked the FDA to ban an alleged, cancer-causing ingredient in decaf coffee that according to OSHA, was found in paint strippers (since banned in paint removers). Ugh! My mornings are ruined. As you may have guessed, Starbucks and Dunkin’ disagree.
The list of banned products goes on and on. The Michigan Department of Agriculture found that a routine sample of black pepper tested positive for salmonella. There is now a nationwide recall of pepper sold by several stores. Just so you know, there have been no reported cases of poisoning to date. Whew!
Salmonella has attacked sweets too. Thousands of cases of popular chocolate products from one of the big-box chains have been recalled. A popular brand of salted peanuts is on the list, as well as certain oatmeal, peanut butter and egg brands. The latter isn’t surprising because bird flu is back and has flown the coop, spreading to dairy cows in 12 states. Geez! No cream cheese, no coffee, no eggs. There goes breakfast.
What’s next, lunch? Yup. The USDA has issued a warning not to eat precooked pork, beef-bacon products and chicken salads due to excess levels of harmful chemicals.
And, if that isn’t enough, we now know microplastics have invaded our bodies in the lungs, the bloodstream and in most foods. Eek, enough already.
It is enough to want to move far, far away where no one has gone before, like Mars. Well, forget about it. Scientists at a university in London (I’m beginning to dislike all things British) indicate that human trips to Mars are in doubt. Their studies have shown that long space journeys can shrink the kidneys. Wonderful!
I can’t leave you with all this dread. There is good news. You will soon be able to throw away your dentures, no more expensive crowns or implants. Japanese researchers have developed a medicine that promises to regrow teeth. Human trials are to begin in September. There’s something to smile at!
And finally, a professor who spent 100 days underwater claims to have reversed his age by 10 years.
There is hope for mankind after all.
Mattapoisett resident Dick Morgado is an artist and happily retired writer. His newspaper columns appeared for many years in daily newspapers around Boston.
Thoughts on …
By Dick Morgado
We watch a lot of British “COP SHOWS” too. Less shooting, more investigating. We like it.